24 Hours A Day

Ya know, it doesn't take a genious to figure out that once you have kids, your life will never be the same. "Mom" is a 24 hour a day job. It never ends and everything is different. Your body, your priorities, your sleeping habits, your morning routines. Everything will change. Your kids affect every part of your life and there are some parts of your life that you just want to go back to your "pre-baby" days. A perfect example? Privacy in the bathroom. Whether I'm in the bathroom to brush my teeth, take a shower or use the toilet, I have no privacy. Today, for instance, I stepped into the bathroom and not more than 2 minutes later I hear, "Mom?" and a knock-knock-knock on the door. It was Alexis. She felt the need to knock on my door and interupt what is supposed to be the "dont-bother-me-cause-I'm-busy-doing-whatever-it-is-I'm-doing-in-here" zone. I gave her the polite, "I'm busy" response and she leaves me alone. Now, here comes Angel. "Mom?" he says. "Angel, I'm in the bathroom, which means I'm busy. Leave me alone, please." He replies, "Ok" and does as he's told. Now when Alexis comes in for the 2nd time, it's as though they're plotting against me. "Mom! Angel..........." I can't hold it in. I shout, "Alexis, get out of my room!" I hear a sigh from her and she is gone. When I got out of the bathroom I addressed the issues that they both had that were so important that they had to bother me while I handeled my business. Were they bleeding? No. Were they short of breath? No. Was there a stranger at the front door threatening to come and invade our apartment? Nope!

It didn't occur to me that simple parts of my life would be effected by my kids. When they younger, the bathroom was my escape route when I needed a minute to breathe. Not anymore. They can now follow me. Who would have thought?

- S.E.

No Bueno

Sad. Alone. Needing a hug right about now. Anxious. Scared. Information at my fingertips that makes me cringe. Why? How? Don't know what to think. It's ok. I'll be ok. Everything will be ok. Right?

- S.E.

HELP!

This baby itch is getting ridiculous. Out of control. And, to be honest, a little surprising. Enough said!

- S.E.

There Are A Few........

........things on my mind today. First, the Caylee case. UGH! Yes, yes, yes it's sad and tragic that a helpless little girl died. I agree 100 percent. I also agree that there needs to be justice and whoever is guilty of taking the life of that little one should get punished to the fullest extent of the law. It seems that everyone is convinced that her mother took her life. Whether that is true or not, we do not know. Sure, there is circumstantial evidence like her getting a tattoo and partying with her friends all while her daughter is missing. But, again, those facts are circumstantial and definitely not enough to commit someone of murdering their own child. I will admit that, yes, the justice system is not perfect. Of course there are going to be mistakes. There will be innocent people who will be found guilty and there will be guilty people found innocent. Nowadays with hard evidence such as DNA and an entire crew in every police station dedicated to forensics, you need those factors for it to be an open and shut case. Sorry, people. That's just how it works.

Secondly, my big, loud, beautiful FAMILY. Seriously, they're an essential part of my life that I can't imagine being without. It goes without saying that I have been mad or upset with a family member but it never lasts long. I mean, it's my family. How could I stay mad? I only have one family and holding a grudge just doesn't make sense to me. I love being able to invite them over. Spend time with them. Laugh with them. At times, laugh at them. And always love them.

Thirdly, this summer schedule, sleeping in till 10, being at the pool all day, no homework, no driving around town, is something I can get used to. Now, of course, each year the summer comes to end. The warm summer days are turned into crisp ones and the everyday hustle and bustle of life returns. That is why, at this very moment, I sit here poolside and just let my thoughts run on. About everything. About nothing at all.

- S.E.

Ramble

I don't know what I feel today. I'm feeling a little lonely to be honest. The kids are outside in the pool and I'm sitting here in front of this screen with absolutely nothing to do. The TV is on, sure, but I'm not paying attention to it. I miss Joy. Sometimes when she's gone during the day and I'm here at home, I get so anxious. I think about her. I think about the smile she has on when she walks through the door. It's always so cute and it never gets old. I welcome it. I definitely look forward to it. Time? 2:20 pm. About 2 hours until she is home. *sigh*

- S.E.